10. Childhood

There were a lot of ways to go with this one.  I thought about pulling out some mementoes from my childhood. I thought about going to the playground and trying for some interesting shots. I thought about the shelves of children's books in my house. I thought about trying to find something that represented my sons' childhood.  Tough.

Then I walked into my closet and saw Elizabeth.

Elizabeth belonged to my mother, but not when she was a girl. Mother bought her when she was 19 or 20, when she herself had one or two children. She told me that Elizabeth was the doll she'd always wanted, that her parents would never buy for her.  Since my mother was already unhappy in her marriage, since she had no way out, no way forward but through, I think that Elizabeth must have represented so much more to Mother than simply the doll she always wanted. There's a wistful sweetness in Elizabeth's face that almost breaks my heart when I look at her now.

In my own childhood, Elizabeth sat on top of a curio shelf next to my beloved Amy (her departure from my life will have to be told elsewhere).  The two were loved and cherished, but seldom touched for fear of damaging them. Elizabeth came to me when Mother was downsizing her house many years ago: My sister had three boys and Nick and I had not yet started our family. Maybe my daughters would love Elizabeth (and all the other sweet treasures from our childhood that my mother had saved).  Alas, it was not to be.  My mother had 7 grandsons, but no granddaughters.

I hope that one day there will be a great-granddaughter whose childhood will be enriched by the sweet love and wistful memories embodied in Elizabeth.